Большие ожидания

Chapter 8

           Withinmyself,Ihadsustained,frommybabyhood,aperpetualconflictwithinjustice.Ihadknown,fromthetimewhenIcouldspeak,thatmysister,inhercapriciousandviolentcoercion,wasunjusttome.Ihadcherishedaprofoundconvictionthatherbringingmeupbyhandgavehernorighttobringmeupbyjerks.Throughallmypunishments,disgraces,fasts,andvigils,andotherpenitentialperformances,Ihadnursedthisassurance;andtomycommuningsomuchwithit,inasolitaryandunprotectedway,IingreatpartreferthefactthatIwasmorallytimidandverysensitive.

           Igotridofmyinjuredfeelingsforthetimebykickingthemintothebrewerywall,andtwistingthemoutofmyhair,andthenIsmoothedmyfacewithmysleeve,andcamefrombehindthegate.Thebreadandmeatwereacceptable,andthebeerwaswarmingandtingling,andIwassooninspiritstolookaboutme.

           Tobesure,itwasadesertedplace,downtothepigeon-houseinthebrewery-yard,whichhadbeenblowncrookedonitspolebysomehighwind,andwouldhavemadethepigeonsthinkthemselvesatsea,iftherehadbeenanypigeonstheretoberockedbyit.Buttherewerenopigeonsinthedove-cot,nohorsesinthestable,nopigsinthesty,nomaltinthestorehouse,nosmellsofgrainsandbeerinthecopperorthevat.Alltheusesandscentsofthebrewerymighthaveevaporatedwithitslastreekofsmoke.

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