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Chapter 30

           Withoutencroachingonforbiddenground,wemayventuretosaythattherecanbenodoubtbetweenourselvesofthatfact.Haveyouanyideayet,ofEstella’sviewsontheadorationquestion?"

           Ishookmyheadgloomily."Oh!Sheisthousandsofmilesaway,fromme,"saidI.

           "Patience,mydearHandel:timeenough,timeenough.Butyouhavesomethingmoretosay?"

           "Iamashamedtosayit,"Ireturned,"andyetit’snoworsetosayitthantothinkit.Youcallmealuckyfellow.Ofcourse,Iam.Iwasablacksmith’sboybutyesterday;IamwhatshallIsayIamto-day?"

           "Sayagoodfellow,ifyouwantaphrase,"returnedHerbert,smiling,andclappinghishandonthebackofmine—"agoodfellow,withimpetuosityandhesitation,boldnessanddiffidence,actionanddreaming,curiouslymixedinhim."

           Istoppedforamomenttoconsiderwhethertherereallywasthismixtureinmycharacter.Onthewhole,Ibynomeansrecognizedtheanalysis,butthoughtitnotworthdisputing.

           "WhenIaskwhatIamtocallmyselfto-day,Herbert,"Iwenton,"IsuggestwhatIhaveinmythoughts.YousayIamlucky.IknowIhavedonenothingtoraisemyselfinlife,andthatFortunealonehasraisedme;thatisbeingverylucky.Andyet,whenIthinkofEstella—"

           ("Andwhendon’tyou,youknow?"Herbertthrewin,withhiseyesonthefire;whichIthoughtkindandsympatheticofhim.

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