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Chapter 18

           Biddynoddedherheadthoughtfullyatthefireasshetookupherworkagain,andsaidshewouldbeveryparticular;andJoe,stilldetaininghisknees,said,"Ay,ay,I’llbeekervallypartickler,Pip;"andthentheycongratulatedmeagain,andwentontoexpresssomuchwonderatthenotionofmybeingagentlemanthatIdidn’thalflikeit.

           InfinitepainswerethentakenbyBiddytoconveytomysistersomeideaofwhathadhappened.Tothebestofmybelief,thoseeffortsentirelyfailed.Shelaughedandnoddedherheadagreatmanytimes,andevenrepeatedafterBiddy,thewords"Pip"and"Property."ButIdoubtiftheyhadmoremeaninginthemthananelectioncry,andIcannotsuggestadarkerpictureofherstateofmind.

           Inevercouldhavebelieveditwithoutexperience,butasJoeandBiddybecamemoreattheircheerfuleaseagain,Ibecamequitegloomy.Dissatisfiedwithmyfortune,ofcourseIcouldnotbe;butitispossiblethatImayhavebeen,withoutquiteknowingit,dissatisfiedwithmyself.

           Anyhow,Isatwithmyelbowonmykneeandmyfaceuponmyhand,lookingintothefire,asthosetwotalkedaboutmygoingaway,andaboutwhattheyshoulddowithoutme,andallthat.AndwheneverIcaughtoneofthemlookingatme,thoughneversopleasantly(andtheyoftenlookedatmeparticularlyBiddy),Ifeltoffended:asiftheywereexpressingsomemistrustofme.ThoughHeavenknowstheyneverdidbywordorsign.

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