Трое в лодке не считая собаки

           Harris(withkindlyencouragement): "It’sallright. You’redoingitverywell,indeed—goon." 

           Nervouspianist: "I’mafraidthere’samistakesomewhere. Whatareyousinging?" 

           Harris(promptly): "WhytheJudge’ssongoutofTrialbyJury. Don’tyouknowit?" 

           SomefriendofHarris’s(fromthebackoftheroom): "No,you’renot,youchuckle-head,you’resingingtheAdmiral’ssongfromPinafore." 

           (LongargumentbetweenHarrisandHarris’sfriendastowhatHarrisisreallysinging. Friendfinallysuggeststhatitdoesn’tmatterwhatHarrisissingingsolongasHarrisgetsonandsingsit,andHarris,withanevidentsenseofinjusticeranklinginsidehim,requestspianisttobeginagain. Pianist,thereupon,startspreludetotheAdmiral’ssong,andHarris,seizingwhatheconsiderstobeafavourableopeninginthemusic,begins.) 

           Harris:"‘WhenIwasyoungandcalledtotheBar.’" 

           Generalroaroflaughter,takenbyHarrisasacompliment. Pianist,thinkingofhiswifeandfamily,givesuptheunequalcontestandretires;hisplacebeingtakenbyastronger-nervedman. 

           Thenewpianist(cheerily): "Nowthen,oldman,youstartoff,andI’llfollow. Wewon’tbotheraboutanyprelude." 

           Harris(uponwhomtheexplanationofmattershasslowlydawned—laughing): "ByJove! Ibegyourpardon. Ofcourse—I’vebeenmixingupthetwosongs. ItwasJenkinsconfusedme,youknow. Nowthen.