Лето
VII
Shecontinuedtocrouchonthesteps,holdingherbreathandstiffeningherselfintocompleteimmobility.Onemotionofherhand,onetaponthepane,andshecouldpicturethesuddenchangeinhisface.Ineverypulseofherrigidbodyshewasawareofthewelcomehiseyesandlipswouldgiveher;butsomethingkeptherfrommoving.Itwasnotthefearofanysanction,humanorheavenly;shehadneverinherlifebeenafraid.Itwassimplythatshehadsuddenlyunderstoodwhatwouldhappenifshewentin.Itwasthethingthatdidhappenbetweenyoungmenandgirls,andthatNorthDormerignoredinpublicandsnickeredoveronthesly.ItwaswhatMissHatchardwasstillignorantof,buteverygirlofCharity’sclassknewaboutbeforesheleftschool.ItwaswhathadhappenedtoAllyHawes’ssisterJulia,andhadendedinhergoingtoNettleton,andinpeople’snevermentioninghername.
Itdidnot,ofcourse,alwaysendsosensationally;nor,perhaps,onthewhole,sountragically.CharityhadalwayssuspectedthattheshunnedJulia’sfatemighthaveitscompensations.Therewereothers,worseendingsthatthevillageknewof,mean,miserable,unconfessed;otherlivesthatwentondrearily,withoutvisiblechange,inthesamecrampedsettingofhypocrisy.Butthesewerenotthereasonsthatheldherback.Sincethedaybefore,shehadknownexactlywhatshewouldfeelifHarneyshouldtakeherinhisarms:themeltingofpalmintopalmandmouthonmouth,andthelongflameburningherfromheadtofoot.