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XLVIII. Doubts Arise—Doubts Linger

           Rememberingallthathadoccurred,shemurmured,"Iwanttogohome!"

           Boldwoodlefttheroom.Hestoodforamomentinthepassagetorecoverhissenses.Theexperiencehadbeentoomuchforhisconsciousnesstokeepupwith,andnowthathehadgraspeditithadgoneagain.Forthosefewheavenly,goldenmomentsshehadbeeninhisarms.Whatdiditmatterabouthernotknowingit?Shehadbeenclosetohisbreast;hehadbeenclosetohers.

           Hestartedonwardagain,andsendingawomantoher,wentouttoascertainallthefactsofthecase.Theseappearedtobelimitedtowhathehadalreadyheard.Hethenorderedherhorsetobeputintothegig,andwhenallwasreadyreturnedtoinformher.Hefoundthat,thoughstillpaleandunwell,shehadinthemeantimesentfortheBudmouthmanwhobroughtthetidings,andlearntfromhimalltherewastoknow.

           Beinghardlyinaconditiontodrivehomeasshehaddriventotown,Boldwood,witheverydelicacyofmannerandfeeling,offeredtogetheradriver,ortogiveheraseatinhisphaeton,whichwasmorecomfortablethanherownconveyance.TheseproposalsBathshebagentlydeclined,andthefarmeratoncedeparted.

           Abouthalf-an-hourlatersheinvigoratedherselfbyaneffort,andtookherseatandthereinsasusualinexternalappearancemuchasifnothinghadhappened.Shewentoutofthetownbyatortuousbackstreet,anddroveslowlyalong,unconsciousoftheroadandthescene.ThefirstshadesofeveningwereshowingthemselveswhenBathshebareachedhome,where,silentlyalightingandleavingthehorseinthehandsoftheboy,sheproceededatonceupstairs.

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