Волны

           ButIcannolongerendureextremities;Iwantsomeonewithwhomtolaugh,withwhomtoyawn,withwhomtorememberhowhescratchedhishead;someonehewasateasewithandliked(notSusan,whomheloved,butJinnyrather).InherroomalsoIcoulddopenance.Icouldask,DidhetellyouhowIrefusedhimwhenheaskedmetogotoHamptonCourtthatday?Thosearethethoughtsthatwillwakemeleapinginanguishinthemiddleofthenight--thecrimesforwhichonewoulddopenanceinallthemarketsoftheworldbareheaded;thatonedidnotgotoHamptonCourtthatday.

           ’ButnowIwantliferoundme,andbooksandlittleornaments,andtheusualsoundsoftradesmencallingonwhichtopillowmyheadafterthisexhaustion,andshutmyeyesafterthisrevelation.Iwillgostraight,then,downthestairs,andhailthefirsttaxianddrivetoJinny.’

           ’Thereisthepuddle,’saidRhoda,’andIcannotcrossit.Iheartherushofthegreatgrindstonewithinaninchofmyhead.Itswindroarsinmyface.Allpalpableformsoflifehavefailedme.UnlessIcanstretchandtouchsomethinghard,Ishallbeblowndowntheeternalcorridorsforever.What,then,canItouch?Whatbrick,whatstone?andsodrawmyselfacrosstheenormousgulfintomybodysafely?

           ’Nowtheshadowhasfallenandthepurplelightslantsdownwards.Thefigurethatwasrobedinbeautyisnowclothedinruin.Thefigurethatstoodinthegrovewherethesteep-backedhillscomedownfallsinruin,asItoldthemwhentheysaidtheylovedhisvoiceonthestair,andhisoldshoesandmomentsofbeingtogether.