Голод
Part III
Whycouldn’tshejustaswelltellmeplainlyandstraightlytogomyway?Iqueried.Yes,indeed,whynot?Therewasnoneedoffeelingembarrassedaboutit.Insteadofremindingmethatthegirlwouldsooncomehome,shecouldhavesimplysaidasfollows:"Nowyoumustrun,forImustgoandfetchmymother,andIwon’thaveyourescortthroughthestreet."Soitwasnotthatshehadbeenthinkingabout?Ah,yes;itwasthatallthesameshehadthoughtabout;Iunderstoodthatatonce.Itdidnotrequiremuchtoputmeontherighttrack;only,justthewayshehadtakenupherjacket,andleftitdownagain,hadconvincedmeimmediately.AsIsaidbefore,Ihadpresentiments;anditwasnotaltogetherinsanitythatwasattherootofit....
"But,greatheavens!doforgivemeforthatword!Itslippedoutofmymouth,"shecried;butyetshestoodquitequietly,anddidnotcomeovertome.
Iwasinflexible,andwenton.Istoodthereandprattled,withthepainfulconsciousnessthatIboredher,thatnotoneofmywordswenthome,andallthesameIdidnotcease.
Atbottomonemightbeafairlysensitivenature,evenifonewerenotinsane,Iventuredtosay.Therewerenaturesthatfedontrifles,anddiedjustforonehardword’ssake;andIimpliedthatIhadsuchanature.Thefactwas,thatmypovertyhadinthatdegreesharpenedcertainpowersinme,sothattheycausedmeunpleasantness.Yes,Iassureyouhonestly,unpleasantness;worseluck!Butthishadalsoitsadvantages.
