Голод
Part III
Ispokenotaword,turnedonmyheel,andwentmyway.
Whatawonderfulsavourtherewasinfeelingoneselfanhonestmanoncemore!Myemptypocketstroubledmenolonger;itwassimplyadelightfulfeelingtometobecleanedout.WhenIweighedthewholematterthoroughly,thismoneyhadinrealitycostmemuchsecretanguish;Ihadreallythoughtaboutitwithdreadandshudderingtimeupontime.Iwasnohardenedsoul;myhonourablenaturerebelledagainstsuchalowaction.Godbepraised,Ihadraisedmyselfinmyownestimationagain!"DoasIhavedone!"Isaidtomyself,lookingacrossthethrongedmarket-place—"onlyjustdoasIhavedone!"Ihadgladdenedapooroldcakevendortosuchgoodpurposethatshewasperfectlydumbfounded.Tonightherchildrenwouldn’tgohungrytobed....IbuoyedmyselfupwiththesereflectionsandconsideredthatIhadbehavedinamostexemplarymanner.Godbepraised!Themoneywasoutofmyhandsnow!
Tipsyandnervous,Iwandereddownthestreet,andswelledwithsatisfaction.ThejoyofbeingabletomeetYlajalicleanlyandhonourably,andoffeelingIcouldlookherintheface,ranawaywithme.Iwasnotconsciousofanypain.Myheadwasclearandbuoyant;itwasasifitwereaheadofmerelightthatrestedandgleamedonmyshoulders.Ifeltinclinedtoplaythewildestpranks,todosomethingastounding,tosetthewholetowninaferment.AllupthroughGraendsenIconductedmyselflikeamadman.Therewasabuzzinginmyears,andintoxicationranriotinmybrains.
