Голод
Part III
Thispoorthinfingerlookedsoutterlypitiable.GodinHeaven!whatapassithadcometonowwithme!Thegloomgrewcloser.Itwas,maybe,notimpossiblethatImightworkupmyfinalethroughthecourseoftheevening,ifIonlyhadacandle.Myheadwasclearoncemore.Thoughtscameandwentasusual,andIdidnotsufferparticularly;Ididnotevenfeelhungersobadlyassomehourspreviously.Icouldholdoutwelltillthenextday.PerhapsImightbeabletogetacandleoncredit,ifIappliedtotheprovisionshopandexplainedmysituation—Iwassowellknowninthere;inthegoodolddays,whenIhadthemeanstodoit,Iusedtobuymanyaloafthere.TherewasnodoubtIcouldraiseacandleonthestrengthofmyhonestname;andforthefirsttimeforagesItooktobrushingmyclothesalittle,gotridaswellasthedarknessallowedmeoftheloosehairsonmycollar,andfeltmywaydownthestairs.
WhenIgotoutsideinthestreetitoccurredtomethatImightperhapsratheraskforaloaf.Igrewirresolute,andstoppedtoconsider."Onnoaccount,"Irepliedtomyselfatlast;Iwasunfortunatelynotinaconditiontobearfood.Itwouldonlybearepetitionofthesameoldstory—visions,andpresentiments,andmadnotions.Myarticlewouldnevergetfinished,anditwasaquestionofgoingtothe"Commandor"beforehehadtimetoforgetme.Onnoaccountwhatever!andIdecideduponthecandle.WiththatIenteredtheshop.