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Chapter 32

           AsIshudderedcoldlybacktolifeandconsciousness,Iheardatinklingsoundoftune,andopeningmyeyeswearilyIsawLuciohimselfseatedinthefullradianceofthemoonwithamandolineonhiskneefromwhichhewassoftlystrikingdelicateimpromptumelodies.Iwasamazedatthis—astoundedthatwhileIpersonallywasoverwhelmedwithaweightofwoe,heshouldstillbecapableofamusinghimself.Itisacommonideawithusallthatwhenweourselvesareputout,nooneelseshoulddaretobemerry—infactweexpectNatureitselftowearamiserablefaceifourownbelovedEgoisdisturbedbyanytrouble—suchistheextentofourridiculousself-consciousness.Imovedinmychairandhalfrosefromit—whenLucio,stillthrummingthestringsofhisinstrumentpianopianissimo,said—

           "Keepstill,Geoffrey!You’llbeallrightinafewminutes.Don’tworryyourself."

           "Worrymyself!"Iechoedbitterly—"Whynotsaydon’tkillyourself!"

           "BecauseIseenonecessitytoofferyouthatadviceatpresent—"herespondedcoolly—"andiftherewerenecessity,IdoubtifIshouldgiveit—becauseIconsideritbettertokillone’sselfthanworryone’sself.Howeveropinionsdiffer.Iwantyoutotakethismatterlightly.

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