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Chapter 17

           Hefeltuncomfortable;hefelttreacherous,thathecouldsitbyhersideandfeelnothingforher.Thetruthwasthathedidnotenjoyfamilylife.Itwasinthissortofstatethatoneaskedoneself,Whatdoesonelivefor?Why,oneaskedoneself,doesonetakeallthesepainsforthehumanracetogoon?Isitsoverydesirable?Areweattractiveasaspecies?Notsovery,hethought,lookingatthoseratheruntidyboys.Hisfavourite,Cam,wasinbed,hesupposed.Foolishquestions,vainquestions,questionsoneneveraskedifonewasoccupied.Ishumanlifethis?Ishumanlifethat?Oneneverhadtimetothinkaboutit.Butherehewasaskinghimselfthatsortofquestion,becauseMrs.Ramsaywasgivingorderstoservants,andalsobecauseithadstruckhim,thinkinghowsurprisedMrs.RamsaywasthatCarrieManningshouldstillexist,thatfriendships,eventhebestofthem,arefrailthings.Onedriftsapart.Hereproachedhimselfagain.HewassittingbesideMrs.Ramsayandhehadnothingintheworldtosaytoher.

           "I’msosorry,"saidMrs.Ramsay,turningtohimatlast.Hefeltrigidandbarren,likeapairofbootsthathavebeensoakedandgonedrysothatyoucanhardlyforceyourfeetintothem.Yethemustforcehisfeetintothem.Hemustmakehimselftalk.Unlesshewereverycareful,shewouldfindoutthistreacheryofhis;thathedidnotcareastrawforher,andthatwouldnotbeatallpleasant,hethought.Sohebenthisheadcourteouslyinherdirection.

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