Портрет художника в юности

Chapter 5

           HefeltwithasmartofdejectionthatthemantowhomhewasspeakingwasacountrymanofBenJonson.Hethought:

           Thelanguageinwhichwearespeakingishisbeforeitismine.HowdifferentarethewordsHOME,CHRIST,ALE,MASTER,onhislipsandonmine!Icannotspeakorwritethesewordswithoutunrestofspirit.Hislanguage,sofamiliarandsoforeign,willalwaysbeformeanacquiredspeech.Ihavenotmadeoraccepteditswords.Myvoiceholdsthematbay.Mysoulfretsintheshadowofhislanguage.

           Andtodistinguishbetweenthebeautifulandthesublime,thedeanadded,todistinguishbetweenmoralbeautyandmaterialbeauty.Andtoinquirewhatkindofbeautyispropertoeachofthevariousarts.Thesearesomeinterestingpointswemighttakeup.

           Stephen,disheartenedsuddenlybythedean’sfirm,drytone,wassilent;andthroughthesilenceadistantnoiseofmanybootsandconfusedvoicescameupthestaircase.

           Inpursuingthesespeculations,saidthedeanconclusively,thereis,however,thedangerofperishingofinanition.Firstyoumusttakeyourdegree.Setthatbeforeyouasyourfirstaim.Then,littlebylittle,youwillseeyourway.Imeanineverysense,yourwayinlifeandinthinking.Itmaybeuphillpedallingatfirst.TakeMrMoonan.Hewasalongtimebeforehegottothetop.Buthegotthere.

           Imaynothavehistalent,saidStephenquietly.

           Youneverknow,saidthedeanbrightly.

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