Портрет художника в юности
Chapter 4
Butthephraseonthepriest’slipswasdisingenuousforheknewthatapriestshouldnotspeaklightlyonthattheme.Thephrasehadbeenspokenlightlywithdesignandhefeltthathisfacewasbeingsearchedbytheeyesintheshadow.Whateverhehadheardorreadofthecraftofjesuitshehadputasidefranklyasnotborneoutbyhisownexperience.Hismasters,evenwhentheyhadnotattractedhim,hadseemedtohimalwaysintelligentandseriouspriests,athleticandhigh-spiritedprefects.Hethoughtofthemasmenwhowashedtheirbodiesbrisklywithcoldwaterandworecleancoldlinen.DuringalltheyearshehadlivedamongtheminClongowesandinBelvederehehadreceivedonlytwopandiesand,thoughthesehadbeendealthiminthewrong,heknewthathehadoftenescapedpunishment.Duringallthoseyearshehadneverheardfromanyofhismastersaflippantword:itwastheywhohadtaughthimchristiandoctrineandurgedhimtoliveagoodlifeand,whenhehadfallenintogrievoussin,itwastheywhohadledhimbacktograce.TheirpresencehadmadehimdiffidentofhimselfwhenhewasamuffinClongowesandithadmadehimdiffidentofhimselfalsowhilehehadheldhisequivocalpositioninBelvedere.Aconstantsenseofthishadremainedwithhimuptothelastyearofhisschoollife.Hehadneveroncedisobeyedorallowedturbulentcompanionstoseducehimfromhishabitofquietobedience;and,evenwhenhedoubtedsomestatementofamaster,hehadneverpresumedtodoubtopenly.
